What are your 'Social Interactions' saying about you?

Winston Churchill famously said:

"You have enemies?.... Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life."

I actually really like this quote and I have a broader if somewhat 'softer' interpretation I would like to share with you.

We live in very 'sociable' times where we do our best to maintain many complex relationships including family and friends but also extending to colleagues, business associates, customers and even Facebook and LinkedIn, etc, etc...

Some would argue that better communication technologies (like mobiles, email and social networking) make it easier to maintain and build your relationships and whilst there are certainly merits to these claims (I am pro-Social by the way), I think it is worth considering the additional expectations and problems they carry.

If you make social interactions more frequent and more convenient, you essentially devalue them unless of course, the demand for social interactions is increasing at an equivalent or greater rate. An economist would describe this devaluation in terms of supply and demand. When the supply of something exceeds demand, it's market value decreases. At the risk of oversimplifying a very complex subject, I am suggesting that technologies like Facebook, LinkedIn, Skype, Whatsapp, Snapchat, Twitter, etc are essentially commoditising social interactions. In plain terms, they are making social interactions cheaper, more frequent, more convenient.

 An example of a traditional commodity would be plastic bags. 100 years ago, these would have been a marvel and an example of innovation. People would have paid a lot of money for one and they would have been highly differentiated from other types of carrying 'devices', but today -because of the abundance of supply- they are cheap, available in pretty much every shop you go in (not to mention bursting out from every spare nook and cranny you have in your kitchen/utility rooms) and indistinguishable from one another.

I think, mostly, we welcome commoditisation and we benefit from it. However, in terms of social interactions, I am not so sure. I like the cheaper, more frequent and more convenient part but I am not so sure I am happy with the indistinguishable part.

So what does this mean? Who knows? That is the great things about new technologies - they usher in new ways of living, new cultures, new expectations. What I can tell you from my own observations is that people are expected to maintain a much higher level of social interactions than ever before - because it is cheaper and easier to do so. However, the value being placed on these interactions is decreasing. Personally, I do not respond with the same level of urgency and care to a Facebook message or SMS as I would to a Skype video call or someone actually knocking on my door.

Having said this, I don't believe expectations are consistent yet. I will regularly get people complaining about my lack of replies to something posted on Facebook or sent to me by email that is supposedly important to them. If that is truly the case, why have they chosen to devalue the interaction rather than calling me or visiting me? I don't think people yet realise that the value of their communication is reflected by how convenient it was for them to make it. If it took you all of 30 seconds to start a social interaction, don't expect a great deal back from people. Surely this is common sense.

Whilst the case could be made that social commoditisation is devaluing our meaningful relationships, on the flip side, it is also increasing the value of our interactions with large businesses and organisations. Take, for example, Sky, Netflix or eBay. These are very large businesses with enormous customer bases. Do they have the time and bandwidth to deliver highly customised and tailored customer experiences through traditional methods? (i.e. calling you or visiting you every day) No... but by integrating their systems with social platforms, large organisations can gain insight into your preferences as a customer and create a more tailored and valuable customer experience for you.

So, in essence, Social commoditisation is enhancing our individual relationships with large organisations and businesses but potentially devaluing our social interactions with friends and family. Good and Bad. But I don't believe this will be the case in the long run. In the long run, I think it is more Good than Bad. Like any new technology, it takes time to integrate properly into the lives of the individual, organisations and societies. There are always teething problems. Here are my hard and fast rules around social interactions:

• Match Importance to Value: If you have something important to communicate, match the importance of your message with the value of your interaction. I.e. don't ask your partner to marry you in the form of a tweet. Stick your hand in your pocket and take them to dinner at least! 
• Avoid mixed messages: be clear about distinguishing the type of social interaction you want. For instance, don't create a Facebook network of friends and spend all day posting updates about your business venture. Create a specific business profile or use another tool like LinkedIn. Likewise, don't post photos of your cat on LinkedIn. 
• Don't rely on Social technologies for valued relationships: There is no substitute for meeting up with someone in the flesh as these interactions are genuine and unbounded. Social technologies in this instance should be viewed as complementary - not a basis. 
• Use social technologies to maximise your interactions with large organisations and business: Businesses are highly social and are investing billions in their mobile and social strategies to build more meaningful relationships with their customers. Take advantage of this and communicate with your favoured brands/organisations on Twitter, Linkedin and Facebook.
• Be aware of your brand: Whether you like it or not, having a digital presence gives you a personal brand. This could be business related but also personal in terms of your integrity. If you care about what you stand for, make sure you communicate that. Keep true to your core values (as you would in your close relationships) and be consistent. Believe it or not, not being online doesn't mean you avoid branding, it just means your brand will be shaped by others. I know people who chose not to be on Facebook, Twitter, etc... but I see pictures and content relating to them. 

Going back to Winston Churchill for a moment... I think we should all be embracing these new -and very cool- ways of communicating. But I agree with Churchill, I think you should have the courage and confidence to stand for something. Don't try and be all things to all people- its never going to happen. The audience is too damn big and too savvy. Understand who you are, understand what you stand for and get comfortable with the fact that some people just don't like you or your brand. Winston Churchill uses the terms enemies, in moderns terms: 'haters' will be haters and where there is a bridge there will be a Troll!

However you decide to define yourself in the digital age, don't lose sight of the important people in your life and don't substitute deep and meaningful relationship interactions with lots of meaningless, easy and 'popular' ones. You, like everyone else, only have some much time in a day and time is one true currency you have to at your disposal to substantiate how much you value someone and your interactions with them. Businesses want to commoditise and scale this - because they want to maximise their profits - but there is no value in that for real friendships. 

On that note, I genuinely thank you for the time you have spent reading my blog and I hope that in some way this interaction has been valuable for you. 

Cheers,

Chancey